Earthquake

My last post seems so ironic now. It was written two days before a devastating 8.9-9 magnitude earthquake struck Japan off of the coast of Sendai. It has been a little more than a week since the quake struck and life has been turned completely upside down. I need to write about this so I don't forget. It just all still seems so surreal. I never thought I would live through a natural disaster, national state of emergency, and military evacuation... Here are some of my thoughts throughout this situation:

Friday March 11th

I was taking a nap in my bedroom with Lilia and I had woken up. She was still asleep and I was just laying there not wanting to disturb her and thinking about... I can't remember. Maybe the English class I was supposed to teach in about an hour. At about 2:45pm the bed started shaking and then the lamps started to shake too. I have experienced numerous earthquakes in my time here so I didn't think too much of it at first, but then it got stronger and it kept going. I heard creaking sounds and people shouting outside. Lilia woke up with a horrified look on her face and our bed was rocking and shaking more than I have ever felt before. I thought it might fall apart. I held Lilia to me and told her it would be ok over and over again. I think I was telling myself too, because the shaking wasn't stopping and I was beginning to feal frightened. Usually earthquakes around here last about 30 seconds to a minute or so. This one went on and on. I have heard that it was over three minutes, but maybe even 4 where we were. The whole house was creaking and books were falling off of shelves. Finally I got us out of the bed and went into the hallway where there were no windows or pictures on the wall. The shaking stopped and I carried Lilia around the house to assess damage. We had nothing break. Picture frames were all askew on the walls and some had fallen down. A few books had fallen. Wow! I thought! That was totally crazy! I jumped on Facebook to announce that that was by far the largest quake I had ever felt. I had no idea what it meant for others further away at this point. My friend Leia came over about 15 minutes later and told me she didn't want to be alone. "Can I hang out with you for a bit?" "sure!!" I told her I would have to pick up my English student soon, but she was more than welcome to join me. We felt an aftershock before we left. It was strong too. We headed out to my car and drove off base to pick up Minako. She wasn't there. She is never late. I decided to wait for 10 minutes and then go back home. When she didn't show we came back home and I had received a very curt e-mail from her saying that she had to cancel. Leia and I stayed together and then decided to go out to dinner. We didn't feel like cooking. We went to eat and experienced further aftershocks at the restaurant. Everyone was on edge. After we finished eating I went home and made some phone calls and checked my e-mails. At first the earthquake was labeled as a 7.4 or so but the number climbed and climbed. There were tsunamis and further warnings. I was sick with worry over Cliff who had left for deployment the day before and his ship was due to pull out of Yokosuka that afternoon. When I heard about the first tsunami I frantically called the XO's wife to see if anyone knew if his ship had gotten out to sea! They had and I relaxed a little. I spent the evening watching the horror of this disaster unfold. We had aftershocks throughout the night. I was in disbelief.

To be continued....

Seriously SOOOOO Blessed

If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. That's what I learned from watching "Bambi" as a kid. I think you can take that phrase in a different direction and also say "If you can't say something positive, don't say anything at all." My lack of blogging has been due to the latter. A huge pet peeve of mine is hearing people complain about every little thing all week and all day long. I can't stand it. Probably because I am guilty of this myself often enough. Don;t we always hate in others what we see in ourselves? Well this year I am making a concerted effort to not complain. I decided that if those people on facebook that update their status with a complaint drive me bonkers - then I had better not be putting any of that crap online either. So there! Now you can hold me accountable!

Most of this new attitude was brought on by the morning sickness, but I had an epiphany this past weekend. Cliff and I got some pretty wretched news concerning his career and our future and I have to be honest - I did NOT take it well... at first. The first night I was angry and bitter and physically hurting. I developed a terrible migraine and couldn't sleep at all that night. I tossed and turned and was physically sick. I prayed all night long that I could be at peace with this turn of events and come to accept God's will and our circumstances. The next morning I had an incredible experience. The sun came through our window and woke me up. Cliff and Lilia were out in the front room laughing and playing and "The Messiah" was playing quietly through our speakers. I usually hate waking up early on Sunday mornings scrambling to get ready for church and feeling groggy and queasy, but this morning was so different. I knew it was the answer to my all-night prayer. I felt lighter than air and OPTIMISTIC! God loves me and my family and didn't want me to worry or be unhappy. I decided right then and there that I was going to follow His lead and choose to look at our situation differently. Did I have every reason to be scared, upset, and angry? Maybe. Was anyone forcing me to feel those things? Absolutely not. It was my choice and I felt powerful. Being miserable doesn't change your situation. It just makes you miserable. You can be the victim all your life or you can take charge. Now does this mean I am never going to get mad or upset again? Uhh... have you ever been the Base Health Clinic Atsugi??? The difference is that where you can change your circumstances, change them! Where you can't, you can't and stewing about it isn't going to help anyone.

So now on to the blessings!! This is where I get sappy and annoying, so if you aren't up for it - move along! Cliff and I have been so incredibly blessed throughout our lives and our marriage. So far in his career we have had literally everything work out in our favor. We got to spend the first year and a half of our marriage living in beautiful sunny Florida relaxing and traveling and loving life! After Florida Cliff got his first choice of station leaving flight school and we headed off to Japan! Have deployments been fun? Not really. But we have traveled to Thailand and Guam and China. I have been to Sapporo Japan and Singapore! We have a GORGEOUS daughter and another baby on the way. Have my pregnancies been easy? Not really. But I can GET pregnant and that in and of itself is pretty amazing. I have loving parents both on my side and on Cliff's. I have wonderful friends. Friends that are truly priceless to me. So what if we end up living in hole in Timbuktu with scabies or something... er... we still aren't as bad off as Job! I guess I am just trying to say that it is all about perspective and with a little "spin" you can paint any situation gray or golden. Now for some pictures!!!!!

Pigtails!!!


Lilia makes me laugh every single day. She is just the sweetest little thing and she has been my angel and greatest gift. Her little personality amazes me. She is talking up a storm and says the funniest things. We have been trying to teach her some manners and she is awesome with "please" and "thank you" so we have been trying "no thank you." The other day I was brushing her teeth and she was visibly growing impatient. She pushed the tooth brush away and said "thank you, NO!" ha ha!! (It was more like "dee doo, NO!" but you get the idea.)

Lilia usually crashes on the way home from Church. This is Cliff carrying her in.
Poor little sleepy! Those pigtails just crack me up every time.
She loves hats and shoes. She has so many different hats, because the Japanese make adorable and reasonably priced hats that I can't resist. I usually get a fashion show every day. A large portion of Lilia's vocabulary is devoted to apparel.

She was teething something terrible the other day. I gave her a tooth brush to chew on and she was happy as a clam.
Eh... happy?
Cute shoes from the "Bunny" store! They were only 500 yen!

I think she just looks like a little kid in this picture. Definitely not a baby anymore.
Ok, so my last preachy rant is on happiness in general. Is it attainable? You bet! Elder Uchtdorf gave a wonderful talk in conference a couple of years ago about happiness. We are all supposed to be happy, but we have to actively take steps to do so. He recommended creation and compassion. Everyone of us has the capacity to create something every single day. It may be a fabulous work of art or culinary masterpiece or it may be a room full of laughter or a smile. It doesn't matter. We can all create. I made a diaper cake for the first time the other day and I felt so satisfied. It just felt good to make something where there wasn't something before. I am going to make it a goal to try and create something new at least every week. Even if it is just cookies. And then I am going to share my cookies! I may be pregnant, but a batch of cookies for myself each week might have some serious consequences....
Ok... so I can't remember what else I was going to write or rant about, so I will wrap it up. Cliff is talking to me and honestly I would rather go talk to him now that he is home. Life is good.